My husband was murdered and has been deceased for a little over six months now. Unintentionally I find that I dream about him at least 4 out of 7 days that I can actually remember. Usually in many of my dreams, I fnd myself searching for him in various locations. When arriving at a new location he’s never there and I find myself being told by different people (some who I know and some who I’ve never met) that I’ve either just missed him or that they haven’t seen him but that person will redirect me to another place that he might be. Most times I won’t find him at all and will awaken wondering why am I always searching for him in my dreams when I already know in reality that he has passed away. Unforyunately the dream recurs anyway and after searching vigorously (after 2 or 3 different dreams) eventually I always do find him. When I find him he usually appears to be carefree or very angry toward me as if i’m bothering him. Nonchalantly he may hug or kiss me. He may tell me that he loves and misses me but only when I ask him if he does. Overall no matter what he always tells me that he can’t stay, appears to be in a hurry, and attempts to leave. Most times I beg for him to stay but he always says no and before rushing off he will tell me that our life together is over and now he has to move on. Often I awaken damn near in tears because I can’t understand what makes him leave me in my dreams in the manner that he does. After realizing that I’m no longer dreaming I begin most days bouncing back from what feels like me hitting a brick wall after having to accept yet again that my husband is dead and that he’s never ever coming back.
The departed ones cannot move on if some in the living are still hanging on to them emotionally. He probably has things to do and needs to move on, and it is better for both of you if you move on. It is hard, and grieving is never easy. Just make sure you keep company of friends and family, stay with the living, have or create a good social network, rather than clinging on one person. It is his message and the message of the dream.